A Sirius Desire
by CUtopia
Summary: When his godson is born, Sirius finds himself longing to have a child as well - but will Emmeline be as enthusiastic about as he is?


Entry for _Muggle Studies_ at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

 **Task:** Write about a strong desire to have child, and an event that occurs because of this.

Extra Prompt: (emotion) longing

Entry for the _Greek Mythology Competition_

 **Aether:** Write about an Order of the Phoenix member

Entry for the _Bad Movie Tuesday Competition_

Glen or Glenda: [dialogue] "Here we are, two perfectly normal people."

Entry for _Sophie's Bookshop Challenge_

Fairytales #1: The Ugly Duckling by Hans Christian Andersen

 _Prompts:_

(word) Ugly

(dialogue) "Above all, beware of the cat."

(word) Strange

Entry for the _Chocolate Frog Card Club_

(Bonus!) Damocles Rowle; **Challenge:** Write about someone who could be seen to be a little too harsh or strict.

Entry for the _September Event: Back to School_

(dialogue) "Why is there no coffee left? Coffee is a basic human right."

(emotion) Excited

Entry for the _Gringotts Prompt Bank_

A big thank you to Liza and FF, who helped me develop a big part ;) And to Dina, who betaed this for me! :)

(3005 Words)

* * *

 **A Sirius Desire**

Until five minutes ago, Sirius Black had thought that he would probably never want to have children. He considered himself a wild boy who was barely able to be tamed, and settling down and having a family definitely wasn't as high on his agenda as it had been on Lily and James'. Yes, his relationship with Emmeline Vance was happy and he really loved her – the amount of months he'd spent chasing her, and only her, proved it – but to him, the word 'family' had an ugly shadow. He'd never experienced love from his own family, and even though he knew that he'd found a new, better family in his friends, he was afraid that he would pass his loveless childhood on to his own child.

However, all of these worries were suddenly wiped away when Sirius got to hold his godson Harry for the first time. A few close friends had gathered at the Potters' home to welcome the baby, and the little boy seemed confused about all the attention he received. But when Sirius held him, Harry stopped wailing and stared up at him with his round, green eyes and his chubby hands reached out for Sirius' long black hair. Sirius instantly started to smile, and the baby giggled, his fingers hitting his godfather's chin.

In that very moment, Sirius could feel a wonderful warmth spread through his body, and he didn't want to let go of the little boy. He was just so cute and cuddly, he felt like he was going crazy over it. The baby's smile seemed to fill him with a happiness he'd never felt before; it was as if he was feeling the pureness and the innocence of this little boy and received a piece of it.

"Hey Sirius, you look like you want to steal my son! Should I be worried?" James joked as he came over, gently running a hand over his son's head. Sirius grinned and shook his head before grimacing for Harry, who gurgled in joy.

"But seriously, Padfoot, you look great with a baby," James added and winked while patting his best friend's shoulder. "Have you ever thought about having children?"

Sirius looked away from the gleaming eyes of his godson and his gaze wandered to the other side of the room, where Emmeline was standing with Lily and Remus, laughing about a joke. In the past, he would have made a joke about not wanting anything he couldn't transport on his motorcycle, but somehow, he was suddenly looking at the question with more serious eyes.

Clearing his throat, Sirius answered with a low voice, afraid of being overheard: "I don't know if Emmeline wants children at all... we just never talked about it before, and I never considered it."

"I can hear the 'but'."

James allowed his son to grab his little finger and suck on it, more concentrated on the conversation than on the baby.

"I look at Harry and I feel like I want to have a baby, too," Sirius admitted, making another grimace for Harry to rejoice about.

James looked at him for a long moment, and Sirius could tell that his best friend had a remark about oestrogen levels on his tongue. Therefore, he was glad when James managed to swallow it down and simply suggested: "Then ask her. In these times it's probably now or never."

Sirius nodded in silence, looking over to his girlfriend again and their eyes met; Emmeline smiled and waved subtly before turning back to her conversation.

"And Sirius, I'm sad I have to do this, but experience shows I need to remind you: Above all, beware of the cat. So do this subtly, or I'll have to tend another black eye."

OoO

A few days passed in which Sirius hadn't found the right time to subtly direct their conversation topics towards children and having a family, and so Emmeline remained unaware of her boyfriend's wish. In the meantime, Sirius' longing had only been growing; he'd visited Lily, James and Harry a few times since the party, and with every minute he'd spent with the baby boy, his desire to have a child had become stronger.

After he'd returned from dinner with Lily and James and cuddled against Emmeline who was lying in bed already, reading a book, he finally felt like he was ready to talk about the matter with her. However, before he could say something, Emmeline put her book down and turned her head to him, asking: "Is something wrong with you? You've been behaving strange over the last few days, and I'm getting worried."

Sirius pressed a kiss onto her shoulder blade and whispered back: "What should be going on?"

"I don't know, but you know, so tell me," she shot back, looking a little bit annoyed. He knew perfectly that she didn't like to play games, and he realised that it was time to tell her the truth.

Taking a few deep breaths, Sirius slung his arms around her slender body, his hands meeting on her stomach and while giving her his best puppy eye look, he murmured: "I want a baby."

Emmeline blinked a few times, confusion openly showing on her face as she tried to process the information and Sirius actually held his breath while still trying to look somewhat luring.

"Uh... Sirius, this is not something to make jokes about..." she ultimately managed to reply, her voice shaking slightly and proving that she was more than taken aback by this confession.

"But I _am_ serious," he answered, his hands wandering under her top while he pressed his whole body against hers, kissing her shoulder. "Just imagine how our baby would look like... the most beautiful baby in the world. And trying for it will be so much fun..."

A sudden blow of Emmeline's elbow into his stomach made him roll away from her, and Emmeline sat up, staring down at him with disbelief written across her beautiful face.

"This isn't funny, Sirius!"

"That's why I'm not joking!" Sirius shot back, his fingers curling around Emmeline's hand, his eyes gleaming as he looked at her. "I want a baby, with you!"

Sirius knew that his desire had to be overwhelming, but now, as the words had come over his lips, he felt a lot better, and he couldn't suppress his excitement. He could barely keep his hands away from her; all he wanted was to rip her clothes away and make love to her.

However, Emmeline didn't look as enthusiastic as he currently felt; on the contrary, she still wore an expression which made clear that she was assuming he was drunk.

"What do you think about it?" he asked, raising a hand to shove a strand of her brown hair behind her ear. "How about we get it on?"

"Sirius, are you seriously having the desire to knock me up just because you held Harry a few times? Do you even realise how much work a baby is?" Emmeline protested, whacking his hand away and crossing her arms in front of her chest. Her reaction was harsh enough to make him realise that he might have chosen the wrong way to bring this topic closer to her.

"I know, this comes literally out of nowhere, but just think about it... we would make great parents, and-"

A loud snort from Emmeline interrupted him and he looked at her with wide eyes as she snickered: "You, a parent? I mean... uh... Sirius, may I remind you that you were the one who James caught while taking a photo of Harry with a butterbeer bottle and sunglasses?"

"Damn it, he swore that it would be our secret..."

"Sirius, you're sometimes behaving like a child yourself, how are you supposed to take care of a tiny human? I wouldn't even let you take care of a dog," Emmeline sighed, trying to sound as gentle as possible, but she failed. Sirius suddenly began to look a little bit pissed, and she felt like she may have been a little bit too harsh.

"Oh, nice metaphor to tell me I can't even take care of myself."

He looked genuinely hurt, and Emmeline bit her lower lip, trying to think of something to calm him down and also make him seriously think about what having a baby meant. It was obvious that he hadn't really thought about it, that he'd only taken care of Harry for a few hours at best and thus had a rather romantic picture of parenthood.

"Sirius, listen... let's talk about this tomorrow. And after you've changed your first diaper."

Sirius still looked close to pouting as he returned from brushing his teeth, and he turned his back to Emmeline as he climbed into the bed, not holding her in his arms until she fell asleep like he usually did.

OoO

In the following days, Sirius didn't say anything about the matter, and that made Emmeline more than suspicious. He normally was the type of person who wasn't sulking for too long and more importantly, who tried to convince a person even after his ideas had already been denied. Therefore, it was really strange that he was so silent, and she had to admit that she felt uncomfortable about it.

Maybe she'd been too harsh when she'd told him that she didn't think that he was suited to be a parent, but she somehow was glad that she wouldn't have to discuss about it with him for now. Besides her not being sure if she ever wanted to have children, she definitely didn't want to have them now, when they were in the middle of a war. Being in the Order of the Phoenix, she was on the front lines regularly, and she couldn't imagine to have a child in these dangerous times.

One morning, about one and a half weeks after his confession about wanting to have a baby with her, Emmeline returned from a nightly task for the order and found Sirius waiting for her, the breakfast table ready and a smile on his face.

"Morning, beautiful," he whispered and gave her a long kiss, making her forget the days he'd basically ignored her while sulking. She could tell that something was wrong here, but on first sight, everything seemed relatively normal.

"Hey... thanks for the breakfast, I'm starving," she mumbled, slinging her arms around him for a tight embrace before she sat down at the table, grabbing a piece of fresh toast from the little basket. Smearing some butter on it and taking a bite, her gaze was gliding over all the delicious things on the table, but between the fresh fruits, several varieties of jams and cheese, scrambled eggs and bacon, she was still missing something.

Grabbing the empty pot, she cocked an eyebrow at her boyfriend and hissed: "Why is there no coffee left? Coffee is a basic human right."

Sirius shrugged, giving her his trademark innocent puppy look and took a sip from his orange juice as he replied: "Pregnant women should not drink any coffee. It's bad for the baby."

Emmeline blinked a few times, asking herself if she'd hallucinated his words, but she had to realise that she was perfectly sane.

"Sirius. I'm not pregnant. Now give me my coffee!"

He simply ignored her slightly aggressive exclamation and smiled, explaining: "You implied that I have no idea how to take care of a baby. Now, as I'm not only handsome but also smart, I did some research. And naturally, I started with pregnancy, and those books said that caffeine is bad for babies."

Emmeline tried to take deep breaths and be understanding and calm, even though she had the desire to scream at him to stop with this insanity.

"Okay... I'll go and take a shower now, and pretend that you didn't just do this," she pressed out and got up as collected as she could.

OoO

A hot shower later, Emmeline had the hope that Sirius had simply been joking around to try and show her that he was over their little dispute. He'd done that quite often before, and maybe it was like that, too, this time.

After drying herself off with a towel, she put on her underwear and opened the medicine cabinet under the sink, rummaging through the various vials containing Cough Potions and Dreamless Sleep Potions before she found her Contraceptive Draught. She needed to take it at the same time every day, and these night shifts for the Order made it difficult to keep the times. Opening the cork, she suddenly jumped in shock.

"DON'T DRINK ME; DON'T DRINK ME!"

The shrill voice coming from inside the bottle startled her so much that she threw it onto the tiles and it smashed; shards flew around and potion formed little puddles. Cursing loudly, her heart racing inside her chest, she stretched her arm to grab her wand, not wanting to step into the glass pieces. With a short flick, the shards disappeared, and Emmeline opened the little cabinet in which they stored their towels, only to release another angry scream.

"Sirius!"

Only in bra and panties, she stormed out of the bathroom into the living room, where Sirius was lounging on the sofa, grinning as she literally threw herself onto him. Shoving the baby rompers and cute baby pictures into his face, she couldn't hold herself back from screaming at him.

"Sirius, this isn't funny! Why can't you just discuss about it with me like any other reasonable adult would do!"

Her fists were pounding onto his chest repeatedly, her rising anger only being fueled by the fact that Sirius was grinning and obviously more concentrated on her attire than on her words.

"I have to admit that it definitely turns me on when you jump me like this," he chuckled, dodging her slap and grabbing her by the wrists in one swift move. She struggled against him, but he was just too strong, and she'd left her wand in the bathroom, so she had no other choice but to listen and glare at him.

"But didn't these pictures make you broody, hun? Isn't that why you came out in those sexy knickers?"

Sirius' dirty smirk made her even more furious, and she attempted to knee him into the groin; unfortunately – or fortunately for him – her position didn't allow her to hit him with any force at all.

"You're an idiot, Black, a fucking damn idiot, why am I still with you?"

"Because I'm sexy and you love me," Sirius winked smugly, his gaze wandering up and down her body again. "And well, you dropped the bottle so you could act like I prevented you from drinking it.

Even though she knew that it was no use, she aimed her knee for his groin again, only managing to graze him, and Sirius grinned at her, groaning: "Oh yes, just like that..."

An angry growl left Emmeline's lips and she really wished her hands were free – she just wanted to throttle him.

"Here we are, two perfectly normal people," she hissed, rolling her eyes when he wiggled his eyebrows. "Unable to have a proper conversation."

"I know other things we could do properly."

"Oh shut up, Black. Hey, my face is up here!"

"Oh, sorry, got distracted, love."

"Asshole," she muttered, but she could feel the corners of her mouth twitching upwards. "But seriously, why didn't you just address this topic like everyone else would have? With a normal conversation, not a hoarse whisper while trying to undress me!"

"I'm a man, Emmeline, I'm thinking with my Excalibur. And the primal urge to spread my genes just took over... You should see that as a compliment, after all it seems like you're the best partner to procreate with!"

"I'm flattered," Emmeline said dryly, while Sirius released her hands and slung his arms around her hips, pulling her closer to him.

"Listen... I'm sorry. I admit that I got overwhelmed. But you have to admit that Harry is a damn cute baby! And I was just..."

"Taken over by your oestrogen?"

"Don't interrupt me, woman. I'm trying to apologise here!"

"Sorry."

Sirius looked at her for a long moment, his hands gently running up and down her sides before he continued: "I guess I was just too enthusiastic. I should have talked to you about it, to hear what you think about it. Looking back, I may have been a bit too horny. I'm sorry that I literally jumped at you with that idea. So, what do you really think about having a baby?"

Emmeline sighed and pressed a kiss onto his cheek; his expression was so cute that her anger just disappeared.

"I'm not sure if I ever want to have children, it's something I haven't seriously thought about so far," she admitted, her fingers playing with the neckline of his t-shirt so she had something to occupy them with. "And now that we're in a war... I don't know if I want to bring a kid into this unstable world. We could be killed any day and..."

Sirius nodded as she just let the sentence fade out and then she leaned forwards to kiss him passionately.

"But that doesn't mean that we couldn't practice a bit," she whispered seductively into his ear, her hands pulling his shirt up.

"I like your way of thinking," Sirius groaned and allowed her to pull the shirt over his head. "That's one reason why I love you."

He rolled them over on the sofa, and Emmeline wrapped her legs around him; they would certainly practice a lot until their thoughts about children would get more serious again.


End file.
